Analysis of WHAT GROWS HERE?

What grows here?
I bought myself some seeds,
A garden was my thought.
Grandkids opened the packets
And dumped them in one pot!

My spirits were not dampened,
As I roto-tilled the earth
I planted the mixed seeds together,
Which filled the kids with mirth.

They will not grow like that,
They said I was a fool;
everyday I tended to my seeds
With my hoe and weeding tool.

Soon things began to grow
which I could not identify.
People drove many miles to see and
laugh so hard they would cry.

But in spite of it all, I worked hard,
I really, really tried;
when they would ask what I had,
My confusion I could not hide.

Things were growing really fast,
Some plants began to sprout;
I had to make up names for things
So this is what I figured out..

The cucumquash had grown so big,
The radatoes I could not mash,
The corn and beans had grown as one
To make instant succotash.

Hot peppers and grapes together
Grew on a single vine.
When crushed, mashed, fermented
They made a tangy wine.

Garlic and tomatoes grew as one
To make a spicy dish;
If I wanted an unusual garden
I certainly got my wish.

The turnips turned all soft,
The rutabaga, do not ask please!
The watermelons are all green
But are the size of peas.

The string beans did not string,
The potatoes have no eyes,
Something is growing ten feel tall,
Even God could not recognize.

I applied to the government
For a stimulus grant.
I was sure I would receive it
With my unusual plants.

Alas, the government turned me down,
They did not believe my report.
Next spring I will pave my garden over
And make a tennis court!