My Ebbing

Simone Scholtz 1985 (Bloemfontein)



Despair tugs at my confidence once again
my darkness clawing its way out
I welcome her like an old friend

Doubt somehow escaped
taunting my serenity
smirking at me from within
laughing as I cower

Building around me, my own prison tower

Peace once again an eternity removed
My healed wounds gaping, festering, infecting

I had this.

I know I did.

or so I thought

I forgot, darkness does not rest
instead it wears you down from within.

That place where you bury it never, ever surrenders.
It takes prisoners, it never becomes one.

Weary to the bone, I once again admit defeat

As I kneel hopelessly at darkness’ feet

About this poem

Fighting the urge to contact someone that shattered my being and did so much damage to me. Not yet understanding the effects of a trauma bond on ones mind, body, heart and soul.

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Written on December 18, 2022

Submitted by simonescholtz85 on April 28, 2023

Modified by simonescholtz85 on April 28, 2023

39 sec read
2

Quick analysis:

Scheme XXX XXAB B XX X X X XA XX C C
Closest metre Iambic tetrameter
Characters 635
Words 133
Stanzas 11
Stanza Lengths 3, 4, 1, 2, 1, 1, 1, 2, 2, 1, 1

Simone Scholtz

Growing up in the Free-State, raised by parents that certainly were not meant to reside in one dwelling, Simone Scholtz chose to escape into the magical world of reading starting at the tender age of 4. She is currently working on her first novel “Trust Cannot Be Earned” which is loosely based on her own familial background that hides a few witches and some rather uncomfortable secrets. In the midst of living life and studying many different fields that peak her interest including NLP, CBT, Hypnosis, Energy Healing, Qigong (to name a few) and devouring anything based on the occult and history she could lay her hands on, she had her heart shattered due to some questionable choices she made. This led to the demise of her very own “happily ever after” and the only escape that kept her sane enough to raise her only child and cling onto the person she knew she could be, was turning to pouring her emotions into her first collection of poetry “The Places I Never Thought I'd Go: Memoirs of my bewildered soul”. more…

All Simone Scholtz poems | Simone Scholtz Books

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